I only jerked off in the dorm showers once this past year.

No really. I thank Jakobson dearly for my knowledge of diff eq now. If you disagree you can wron yourself up the skian.

I fucked a guy so hard that he came without touching his dick!

I have completely fucked up my entire academic career here at cp... I have been on academic probation and now I calculated my GPA and they only way I can even manage to get a 3.27 is to earn a 4.0 my last two semesters. My gf graduated with a 3.6 last semesters so I feel like the tides are turned. I fucked up my undergrad career and I want to care but its hard for me when I lack the interest necessary in order to do well... Someone give me words of motivation. Is a 3.27 even worthy for a AA male in the workforce or even a good graduate school? FUCKK man I am currently at a 2.57 and I need to do better ;(

Professor Jakobson was an amazing teacher.

I always wonder if my roommates can hear me when I fart in my room.

I don't understand why NJ gets so much hate. I mean for real, Maryland is way more of a dump. Barely any beaches not to mention a big part of the state (mainly near WV) is filled with white trash. Let's be real people, NJ is a much better state as a whole. Don't give me that bullshit about the TV show because anyone with half a brain can realize that the people on the show are no representation of the real people of NJ.

I think I'm a necrophiliac...