#5249 Girls! Girls! Where can I learn to do make-up? I want to look pretty so I can get some sex.

#5248 I keep a cookie jar under my desk so just in case somebody is using the bathroom and I have to pee, I can just pee in it. So far, I had to use it twice.

#5247 I was taking a shit and I saw this big bug. I got so scared that I ran. I could not wipe my butt and now I am without my pants.

#5246 I wish Chipotle accepted Terp Bucks.

#5245 I came back to my dorm pretty drunk one night and decided to make out with this random guy in the hallway. I barely know my floor-mates so I have no idea if he lives on my floor or not. I thought I saw him the other day, but I don't really remember what he looks like besides he was cute. Looking back, I feel guilty about it because I have no idea if he had a girlfriend or not.

#5244 I'm a guy and I consider myself a feminist. Why is socially acceptable for us as men to not wear shirts at the beach or on a hot day, but not women? I think women should be allowed to walk around without their boobs out. They already have it hard enough. Let those babies breathe.

#5243 Physics is literally giving me depression.

#5242 I'm a girl who is bi-curious and really wants a cute girl to play and explore with. :)