#7594 I need a study break, and I figured I'd be a benevolent motherfucker and post this for all of UMD's benefit:
A lesson for guys on NON-SHITTY CASUAL SEX 101!
(this is from a girl, so I can't speak for non-hetero sex)
-COMMUNICATION IS
#1. It's sooo much hotter when a guy asks me if I like things, or what I want, or if I could do something for him. And it's a two-way street. I ask him those same questions. Especially important is setting boundaries at the beginning. i.e If you want oral, ask if they're okay with oral. If you want PIV sex, ask if they're okay with PIV sex (commonly referred to as "sex"). It doesn't ruin any type of mood. If anything it gets my anticipation up, talking about what we will do. Also, nonverbals. Make sure they're into it. If not, ask them what they want.
-Consent is very important. My lover has every right to stop when they want to/not do anything they're uncomfortable with. Because yes, guys can be sexually assaulted and raped. Also, it's just the decent thing to do. And it prevents awkward hesitance or disarousal(?) later. It shows you care, and that's hot (sensitive guy points). More reasons: you get to maximize the pleasure you give your partner. Meaning they come back for more, and if they're decent people, they'll try harder to get you off too.
-Common female complaints about hetero sex:
"I went down on him but he wouldn't kiss me after"
"I went down on him but he didn't go down on me."
"There was no foreplay"
"It was so impersonal. I felt like his sex doll." (Meaning, there is a certain degree of intimacy with casual sex too. Kissing, caressing, etc.)
-Foreplay! If a girl is not aroused, she will be dry. Meaning BURNING FRICTION FROM YOUR HARD DICK INSIDE US. Use fingering as a way to check and see how wet your girl is. If you don't feel enough slickness to have your fingers well lubricated, she's not ready. Or pull out the lube. Some girls may naturally produce less lubrication but be ready for Tha Dick. Once again, communicate.
-Notice, DICK SIZE IS NEVER A PROBLEM. In fact, I've noticed that guys with larger dicks think that they're amazing in bed and don't do much more than pumping. Cue fake orgasm, waiting for him to finish, and leaving.
-Reciprocity is key. If you show that you actually want me to get off, I'll be a lot more generous.
-I repeat, sex is not just you thrusting your dick at me. How do lesbians have sex in (good) porn? Caressing, making out, and oral. Occasionally toys, but most would be uncomfortable with toys during a hookup. And lesbian porn gets a lot of girls off. Boys, take notes. You want to fuck like a lesbian (not to minimize the pleasure potential of your dick. It's just that too many of you use it exclusively)
-Limit drinking if you're looking to hook up, and try to make sure your partner isn't too tipsy either. There are many reasons for this. 1) Whiskey dick 2)Whiskey clit 3) Guys kinda suck at putting on condoms/take too long to put on condoms when they're too tipsy 4)Most serious: the boundaries of consent are fucked up. The person isn't capable of consent. Yes, it's inconvenient bc parties and drinking environments are where most people find hookups. But really, if the other person is drunk you're essentially raping them. They're disabled. They could forget everything the next day. They don't know what they're getting themselves into. In most cases, good friends won't let their friend who's had too much to drink go home with someone. But use good judgement on your part as well. Sexual assault and rape is a problem on this campus.
Let's see a version for girls. I'll be the first to admit: I accidentally use teeth sometimes.
