Every time I go out, I tell at least one girl I'm a virgin. Hoes love stealing virginities.

You know it's an all-time low when you shave your legs in the drinking fountain

Things I've gotten from college... Herpes, adderall addiction, & a 4.0. Can't tell if I'm a failure or if this is how you win.

I am in a relationship, so naturally I am excited about Valentines Day tomorrow. But nothing pisses me off more than seeing all of my single friends post about how sad they are that they're single and that they hate all the happy couples out there. It is pathetic and freaking annoying. So all of the single people out there, enjoy your day tomorrow and spend it with people you care about like family and friends. DONT SPEND THE DAY COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW LONELY AND SAD YOU ARE THAT YOU ARE SPENDING VALENTINES DAY ALONE!! There are so many people way worse off than you, so if being single on v-day is the only thing you are worried about, you're pretty damn lucky.

This girl with a septum piercing was making eyes at me today in class... and I am also a girl. I wish I could know if she was interested in me the way I was interested in her.

Today I smiled at the beautiful tall man with the gear tattoo on his shoulder, mostly just to do something with my mouth other than vomiting out of sheer nervousness. Man he gives me those butterflies.

I want to be stripped naked and humiliated in front of a bunch of guys... I'm a lesbian

I just want to take the time out to thank the handsome man with the dark longish hair who was on his skateboard near the liberal arts building for that gorgeous smile you gave to me. I looked up in just enough time to meet your gaze and that one smile made my entire day.