I am the long arm of the law. Because if I catch you breaking the law in a stupid way, I'll smack you right upside the head.

I just got fired from my first real after college job today. Fuck, fuck, fucken Cunt stick diddly whore. Sigh, JUST FUCK MY ARSE. I keep laughing but inside I'm crying. Recent dui won't make the new job search any easier. Sigh.

I'm a little bit of a heavier guy, but not ridiculously overweight, and I feel like shit because I see all these ripped as fuck guys out there. I mean, power to them for working out and sticking to their training regimen, but I don't think that women want a guy that's got a little bit extra when they could have someone that's built for speed.

I am losing so much sleep and my roommate has finally decided to snore at night. AHHHHHH!!!! As I'm living with this roommate I feel as though I should've done a background check on her. But I have to deal with this. Maybe I should just avoid it and just not talk to said roommate. Also this person sings so much I hate playing my music out loud and I have been using my headphones now to block out her singing.

I saw this guy once and I didn't like him..
I see him more and more and I think he's the most absolute adorable person I have ever seen.
saw him at a bus stop today and he looked absolutely stunning.
I just want to give him a big hug and take him out to dinner :)
but that won't happen.. :(
I cant wait to see you again next Wednesday though :)

I've had an insane spike in self-esteem and now I find it so easy to talk to cute boys lol but I'm still so confused on how dating works

That moment when The Sims control your life instead of you controlling it

SO you know how when u flush after a shit there's a bit of a back splash? Well......some hit me in the face....