I absolutely hate it when people try to apply logic to jokes. You're no fun to be around, stop being a kill joy.

i beat the meat like I'm a fucking butcher and i punked this pussy like I'm ashton kutcher

I masturbate almost every single night before bed. I have a public sex fetish along with police men, toys and normal things but lately that hasn't been enough. I have been getting off to lesbians scissoring and sitting on each others faces... Let's makes sure one thing is clear here; I'm a straight female. No doubt about my sexuality. So why would that get me so damn hot and wet??

I've been meeting a lot of people lately to get into a relationship and make friends. No matter how many people I meet, I still feel alone at the end of the day. I went on a date with 3 different girls this semester and it just did not work out. However, now I do not call or text new girls, because I am too discouraged, and it does seem to be worth investing a lot of time in them. I still approach girls, just because it is fun to pay compliments to them, have a pleasant talk and get their numbers for the sake of politeness.

wtf is this pose where girls are like fake hugging but leaning away from each other? Like who thought that was cute?

I saw this girl I had class with in a porno today

Why ask for my number if you're never going to call or text??

I love Ed Sheeran's new song "Thinking Out Loud". Makes me smile. It also makes me realize not having someone special sucks. #hopelessromantic