I don't need a boyfriend. Truly, I don't. But recently, my roommate has started seeing someone and she brings him over quite often. And I have become acutely aware of how single I am and how I don't even have an option of meeting someone. And it's just really upsetting.

I'm a simple woman. I like bearded men and breakfast foods.

I talk to my mom every single day, and I see nothing wrong with it. We're very close and I miss her when I'm away.

My room mate spends days on the phone with his girl friend. Most of the time they won't even talk, they just listen to their background noise. They sleep, eat, and breathe being on the phone together. I think this is extremely unhealthy and I'm worried for him. I would get talking for a few hours or texting throughout the day, but when you spend usually 4-5 days 24/7 continuously on the phone together without ever hanging up with the phone glued to your face or hand while you don't even have anything to say (or even when they are sleeping)...I think that's a sign of serious dependency. He's never talked to a friend or had one over and only leaves to go to school, and had a suicide attempt at the beginning of the school year. I really care about him and he's a great person with a wonderful personality, but I'm extremely worried. He's so dependent on this girl, and she doesn't exactly treat him right from what I've seen/heard. How can I go about helping him without hurting him? Is this something where I'm judging too much and should just let him be? Or should I actually be as worried as I am? Should I notify my RA incase they break up and he tries to kill himself again? What do I do?

every time i play any video game with character customization, i use it to make the closest facsimile i can of danny devito

I can talk to cops, but I can't talk to girls. It's a gift and a curse.

Sometimes when I'm at Cline, I'll pick up a book from the shelves, sneak it into my backpack, go to the bathroom, pee/take a shit inside its pages, and then put it back on the shelves. I hope somebody finds my little surprises some day!

I'm in a complicated relationship. I love how they look. I love how they smell. I love how they make me feel for about five minutes, but after being with them, I start to feel kinda sick. I like how reliable and easy it is to get with them, though. I'll call them and they're at my door within thirty minutes, no matter where I am.
So here's to you, pizza. I love you.