I trusted a guy I shouldn't have. And when we were kissing we were laughing at the same time. And it was so fun. Finally, I lied when I said I was cool with being friends. But I'm not going to be the girl that holds on too hard. Instead, I'm going to find a guy that's a better kisser with a bigger dick.
So fuck you too.

For all you ladies who keep wanting a cowboy- I have a joke. What is foreplay for a cowboy? The pickup truck.

ISometimes I think I'm the only girl that likes watching movies like the shining, doesn't want anything serious, listening to classic rock, cooking, baking, drinking nice scotch or rum, or like to randomly go on adventures. I thought Iwas weird when I was little because I'm not like the other girls, someone told me that's the ideal girl ... yet,  I haven't had a date in months.

I vomited into some "homemade" chili and my roommate and her bitchy friends had some, couldn't get enough and finished it under a hour. They have yet to know. I regret nothing. :)

Hey assholes using the laundry room in the Suites building two on the second floor, I'm going to watch a movie and if your shit isn't out of the washers I will throw everything out of there, its been there for hours now. Be smart and actually know when to take out your shit. Thanks for the inconsideration of other residents.

If you're birthday is tonight, them you're fuckin awesome.
HBD for US :D

i am constipated

Going to zombie prom tonight. I'm a gay guy and my friends bailed on me. Let's hope tonight goes even more fun without them.