I am sure I can not be the only person in the world sitting in his dorm reading Junie B. Jones fanfiction in the middle of the night.

I'm a girl and I've had sex with many men. However, I've been talking and dating this dreamy girl for about 2 and a half months. Sexual tension has been insane, and we finally had sex for the first time ever yesterday. By far, BEST SEX I'VE EVER HAD. I had a happy Easter.

To the dumb bitches who keep baby talking, petting, and taking pictures of my service dog... Can you fucking not? She is my medical equipment. By distracting her you are putting my life at risk. Its also a class 1 misdemeanor to interrupt the work of a service dog. Would you grab at/take pictures of someone's wheel chair or oxygen tank? No? Then don't fucking do the same shit to my dog. Her cuteness does not give you free reign to do as you please. Also I'm not deaf or blind. Therefore I can hear and see you saying shit about me. Stop being rude, idiotic, cunts.
sincerely,
someone just trying to get through their day without being harassed

You know your comfortable with your relationship when you tell her to smell your finger and when she ask what is that? I give my best special officer doofy impersonation and tell her "my ass"

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Becoming small does not serve the world; there is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people don't feel insecure around you. We were all meant to shine as children. It's not just in some of us, it's in everybody. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others the permission to do the same, as we are liberated from our own fear.

I just want someone to bite my ass to wake me up in the morning.

I know girls have it rough with having a period in all... but I sometimes wake up with a boner and that's pretty hard..

Saw this Yak: "I wish Mexican food delivered."
My thought: "Well, they can only Juan so fast."

Pretty sure my humor is going to get me a one-way ticket to hell one of these days.