T.H., I hope you don't mind if I call you Campbell's soup the next time I see you, cuz that ass is "Mmm-mmm, GOOD!"

I always look forward to my glorious Turdtanic after all of the holiday food. There's something so satisfying about a good poo.

I come back to my old town to find that one of the busier shopping plazas has just opened up a Chipotle and a Starbucks right next to each other, across the street from a Victoria's Secret and what looks to be an independent feminine footwear store with tons of ugg boots. Just throw in an apple store and you got basic white girl paradise. Good place to find some good vanilla booty though, so it's paradise for this black man as well!

All y'all playing with your fancy ass xboxes and PCs and I'm just here still rockin' my SNES and Sega Genesis. Sonic 3 and Link to the Past forever!

I admit that I have a smaller than average penis. The average size for mexicans is like 7 inches, I'm only 6.

I believe in love at first sight. Why? Because I just met the most beautiful girl in the world and fell instantly in love! ...Is that what you expected? Well no, the real reason is because everyday, I experience hate at first sight towards almost every dumb cunt and motherfucker I see. Since hate at first sight exists, then I guess the opposite exists for someone. Also, fuck you, get your fucking face away from me and don't try to be my friend I don't fucking want any. Stupid bitches.

If you wear a t-shirt or have a bumper sticker with the communist hammer & sickle on it, take it off. You're not rebellious or intellectual. You might as well be wearing swastikas you ignorant fucks.

I'm going to get pregnant to the new D'angelo record. I don't know how -I'm a man - but I will find a way. Can't stop listening to this and haven't been so in awe of an album since the first time I heard Loveless, Revolver, The Queen Is Dead, Geogaddi, good kid, maad city, Takk, Selected Ambient Works, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, etc. I say damn. Am I on point or just being a fanboy?