I wish I could find a group to play Dungeons and Dragons with.

I'm the reason your meal plan is so expensive. I always put way too much food on my plates.

Sometimes, I wish I could turn Super Sayian.

Susan P, who comments on the rec posts, I like your face.

Why are black people always so loud?

One of my brothers sets me up with a chick for a blind date on sort of thing a few weeks ago(Not very good with the ladies). She comes to my apartment and I'm blown away by how pretty she is (definitely way out of my league). So we hang out and we really hit it off, we're both sitting on my couch, laughing and having a good time and watching How I met Your Mother. As time passes we start inching closer and getting a little physical. We planned on going out to dinner later so we're snacking while we hang out. I'm eating cheetos with one hand and have my arm around her with the other, out of nowhere, she grabs my cheeto hand and shoves it down the front of her pants....I still have a cheeto clenched in my hand, but she doesn't notice because she has her eyes closed and she's looking in the air. "just work your magic [Name Deleted] I've never been with a [Greek Name Deleted] before". I've never even touched a woman before this point so I don't say anything, I start rubbing her clit with my finger like askmen.com said to do. "Put a finger in there too!" I take the cheeto that was in my hand and slowly start to move it into her vagina to use as a dildo.....shes moaning but then stops mid moan and looks at me. She pulls my hand out of her pants and sees the cheeto just lying there in her panties...."OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK?! MY SISTERS WERE RIGHT! YOU ARE A WEIRD ONE!". I feel like I've transcended into an ethereal realm of awkwardness and the ONLY thing I can manage to mutter is "I'm d-d---daaangerously cheesy!" She fixed herself up and ran out the door......UNT can I bounce back from this?

One of my brothers sets me up with a chick for a blind date on sort of thing a few weeks ago(Not very good with the ladies). She comes to my apartment and I'm blown away by how pretty she is (definitely way out of my league). So we hang out and we really hit it off, we're both sitting on my couch, laughing and having a good time and watching How I met Your Mother. As time passes we start inching closer and getting a little physical. We planned on going out to dinner later so we're snacking while we hang out. I'm eating cheetos with one hand and have my arm around her with the other, out of nowhere, she grabs my cheeto hand and shoves it down the front of her pants....I still have a cheeto clenched in my hand, but she doesn't notice because she has her eyes closed and she's looking in the air. "just work your magic [Name Deleted] I've never been with a [Greek Name Deleted] before". I've never even touched a woman before this point so I don't say anything, I start rubbing her clit with my finger like askmen.com said to do. "Put a finger in there too!" I take the cheeto that was in my hand and slowly start to move it into her vagina to use as a dildo.....shes moaning but then stops mid moan and looks at me. She pulls my hand out of her pants and sees the cheeto just lying there in her panties...."OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK?! MY SISTERS WERE RIGHT! YOU ARE A WEIRD ONE!". I feel like I've transcended into an ethereal realm of awkwardness and the ONLY thing I can manage to mutter is "I'm d-d---daaangerously cheesy!" She fixed herself up and ran out the door......UNT can I bounce back from this?

Ron Paul