When I start at UMD in just a few days, I'm going to be torn between not wanting to see the ex who cheated on me after dating for two years and wanting to see him to show off how much better I am without him.

http://www.reddit.com/r/AdviceAnimals/comments/1l0agw/as_a_college_professor_this_is_my_best_advice_for/

I wish hentai was real...

Can we have affirmative action for small penises please?

int stress = 0;
while(still_working()){
if(stress > 10) { System.out.println("Gaaah.");
} else { stress++;
}
}

public boolean still_working() { return true; }

I’ve always been told that I play the hard-to-get game very well. The most tragic thing of all is that it is no act. My heart belongs to a man who will never love me back.

Every touch was electrifying. He had me weak at the knees upon first sight. My first kiss with him sent me into dizzy spells. Despite knowing all of his flaws and insecurities, I still get butterflies when I think about him 5 years later. But we met at the wrong place at the wrong time. I suffered no greater heartbreak than when he told me over coffee 2 years ago that he’d found his dream girl. And it wasn’t me.

I have tried so hard to rekindle that same passion. I have had crushes & even relationships, hoping in vain that feeling would come back again. But even the strongest feelings are a feeble glow compared to the fire that once burned untamed in my heart.

I’ve done everything in my power to move on and forget. But now he’s engaged to a lovely woman who has done nothing wrong except be everything I can’t. I'm absolutely distraught, and I'm furious at myself for letting it still get to me. I have all these charming, sweet men chasing after me, and I still can't shake this guy. As dramatic as it sounds, I curse the day I met him 5 years ago because I fear I will never find someone as perfect as he.

I know I'm young, and I've got a lot of people to meet and a lot of life to live, but he set the standards too high. He’ll always be the one that got away, and now I'll always be the woman no man can truly captivate.

God I know he is a player and I have slept with him...but I can't get over his gorgeous smile.

And then we lie together, cry together
I swear to God I hope we fuckin die together
Just me and my (Raging) Bitch