#5153 I frequently want to punch my MATH graders in the gut.

#5152 I broke up with my girlfriend last week and whenever I walk into Stamp I feel like Channing Tatum because bitches always break their neck to look at me.

#5151 I remember going down on my girlfriend last semester for the first time and she farted on my face with her Vagina. She swore that it wasn't an actual fart but it was just her vagina farting

#5150 God shoot me now... just did anal with my boyfriend an HOUR RIGHT AFTER we ate Chipotle and yes, I did fart on his dick

#5149 I'm not smart enough to do homework by myself and I can't hang out with people in my major's lounge because my ex is friends with all of them. It makes me sick to think I ever valued his opinion.

#5144 I feel like I'm the only person on campus who hasn't had random sex in college yet. I'm not even sure if I want to... I have nothing against it, just everytime a situation arises, I can't bring myself to do it, no matter how drunk I am. :/

#5148 I hate it when people go to get on the bus, then block the entry to dig around in their big-ass purse while 10 other people behind them wait in the cold. 1. If you're waiting for the bus, use that time to get your ID out. 2. If you didn't have time to get it out, move out of the way until you find it. Others shouldn't have to pay for your thoughtlessness.

#5147 I don't want to sound like racist, but I wish tinder could let you choose which races to view, just like it let you choose gender. I feel like many people would benefit from such an option