#16176 I just want gay married couples to be able to protect their marijuana plants with guns.

#16176 I hate when someone at work tells me to grow up. I'm further my goddamn education, m'kay, while you trash talk me like you're still mentally in middle school. I'll swing by in about 5 years and see how your "grown up" life is going, and you can get me fries with my combo meal.

#16176 I confess, Katie, I think you are cute too! And green just happens to be my favorite color.

#16175 I don't know, I think I'm bisexual. But I'm in a really loving relationship that could be it for me, so there's no way I can really play with the theory.

#16175 I confess that there's this one guy I went to high school with who we all called Mahaffey, and he was a nice guy and such, but he never really stood out. That is, until I recognized him on Facebook and added him. Holy shit, he's a funny motherfucker. I heard he frequents the comments here, so if he reads this, keep on keeping on bud.

#16174 Dear heavenly blessed beauty, I have been thinking about you speechless and in awe. That deep gaze in your eyes, your perfect smile, all of your features just seem to all come together so well, almost angelical in a sense I suppose. The reason I am writing this is to let you know that I think I have found the most beautiful woman to grace us with her presence on our planet, and I am of course talking about you. I know this might mean absolutely nothing to you, and you probably get many of these types of texts and in real life BUT please understand that I am being as genuine as ever when I say that you are the ultimate dictionary definition of perfection, and I hope that one day God can bestow me with a woman as beautiful as you, I would be forever grateful. I hope that this message finds you well, I do not care if I get a response to this, I am just simply stating the obvious and had to let you know how I really felt.

Admin note: OP's going to need this to quench that thirst https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qo3OM5sPUPM (M)

#16173 What kind of rice puts you to sleep?
Ray Rice.

#16173 I think the blonde woman working at Chik-Fil-A is the new mother figure in my life while I am away from home.