Sometimes when Im laying in bed, I like to take various objects and use my boner to catapult said objects around the room.

I posted on here about sleeping with my twin. It's not a game of thrones spinoff guys. We're serious . We do it. Get over it. P.S. We're fraternal. ;)

What makes me sad is that my friend took 2-4 years to officially become a citizen of Britain when she married a guy there...but if america doesn't let every single person become a citizen just by virtue of the fact that they are people...then it's racist and inhuman. I mean, they might have less room on their tiny island, but we have less room economically. Not to mention the fact that French people get paid vacation, swedes get better disability resources, and european countries have better benefits BECAUSE they can control their population. It's gonna suck to see this nation fall.

I'm a girl and sometimes when I'm at work and flirting with the male customers I get really wet. So I've been going to the bathroom and finger blast myself to them. Like, every day this last week.

My ex girlfriend has cancer. She is in a lot of pain and has no support besides a few family members. I see her from time to time to remind her that there are people that care. But latley I've been wanting to drop out and take care of her. Hope this isn't goodbye nau

I feel like people make mistakes. People deserve second chances, and people are good at heart. EVERYONE. Today I walked up to someone and gave them a flower cause I found her to not be smiling.. she said "I'm allergic to this, but I love it anyways" and smiled so big:) haha she could have easily been rude or thought I was hitting on her.. Thank you:)

Left my ex so damaged she turned into a lesbian. Apparently every time I would act like an ass some dyke would come in and comfort her. They've been in a relationship for the past 4 years, but she still has sex with me on a regular basis. Not sure if this is a win or a fail.

I use to date the most amazing woman. I was 18 and a total mess, partying, drugs, drinking. I was constantly in trouble with the law, and my girlfriend tried so hard to help me. She was sweet, kind, and never judged. She wanted to work with kids, and maybe be a kindergarten teacher. My older brother is an architect and builds houses, and pretty much everyone loves him especially our parents. I got drunk at a family holiday and called my girl the c word. My brother pulled me aside & said that's the girl you marry. Not the hook up. Get your shit together. She broke it off w/ me later after she caught me in bed with some chick I met at a frat party. I went on a binge, and ended up getting clean getting better grades, all while hoping to show her I'm a better man. My brother was right. She was the type of girl you marry. Now I'm sitting here, getting ready for her and my brothers wedding 3 years later as best man, and all I can think about is I lost my soul mate and I'm getting sister. How the fuck did my life get here.