Shout out to the admin who runs this page during finals. You da real MVP

When the library is empty for a while then you see hordes of people rushing into the library. I can't help but to play the imperial march as students take tables one by one. Leaving no survivors.

When my roommate asked me what she should do to make her throat stop hurting, I almost told her to stop sucking so many dicks. Looking back, I wish I had...

It's always a shame when you realize you shaved for nothing

Three years ago today, I met a sad man on the railroad tracks waiting for a train to come and take his life. We struck up a conversation and I convinced him to come with me for some coffee rather than talk on the cold tracks.

Three years later and he is in much better health and I am soon to have a gold ring on my left hand and so is he! I love him so much!

I know I'm going to fail this class. I'm only showing up for the final to make my classmates think I actually have a chance...I know I'm not fooling anyone, though.

I smoke bud before every class. I have all A's with one B, and I also work about 30-35 hours a week. Take that anti-greenies!

So, I was smoking a cig out on my balcony when I heard "FAGGOT!", and then screeching tires. So I look down there like what the fuck, and the dude gets out of his truck, walks up yelling, and straight beat this kid to a pulp. He was literally passed out in the road. THEN, he slashed the dudes tires and smashes his back window! I'm not even going to call the cops, just gonna chalk it up to the stress of finals.