#23116 Hannah Ackerman is by far the most attractive , down to earth girl I have met.

#23115 I honestly think I'd be very comfortable in an orgy.

#23114 I've never won a game of bingo in my life before, but I got a good feeling about next Thursday. That iPad is mine. It's like I've saved up all my bingo karma for this.

#23113 I sometimes hear a lot of noise coming from my roommates room, even when she's not home. The other day I went in to investigate and imagine my surprise when I see her ex-boyfriend rolling around in her bed, naked. Apparently he seeks in the window whenever we're not home and makes himself at home. I politely said I'm calling the cops and left the room. He chased me downstairs begging and pleading for me not to call the police on him. After some heated words back and forth he finally agreed to leave and never return. As he was walking out the door he turned and said, "just one more thing, do you possibly have tree fitty I could borrow for lunch later?" It was at that moment I remembered I don't have a room mate, and her "ex boyfriend" was a 6 story tall, scaly monster from the cretaceous period. I said "get the hell of my porch Mr. Lock Ness monster"

#23112 The worst part about hanging the SpongeBob flag outside of my house is all the panties that keep getting stuck in my lawn mower every time I do yard work.

#23111 How does one straight guy find and befriend another straight guy without coming off as creepy or desperate? In serious need of plutonic friends who like drinking, partying and sexin up the ladies (seperatly of course)

#23110 Girl at the lingerie party Friday night with the giant arm brace you are awesome and you looked amazing!

#23109 So it is now a little over a month until I graduate, and while I have no idea what I am going to do with my life I take pleasure in knowing I will never have to deal with the parking Nazis ever again