LMAOOOOOOO@ todays news! Trump you fuckin DOTARD hahahahahahaha #TeamKimJongUn #Trumpgotroasted

two of the worst things every week: Friday classes and Monday classes fuck fuck fuck

I had to take a dump during class so I had to leave class for a while. And you know how you get super conscious of those sitting around you, who may judge you on how long you were gone? They'll think if you take too long to come back it's definitely a pooper... Well it was my lucky day! I pooped a real clean poop *bloOoOop* so I even only had to wipe once! One hitta quitta! Rick RoSS!! BoSS!! Came back real quick so my classmates probably think I took a #1 yassssss!!

Abbott can't teach for shit.

I wish we could play king of the island. We would play this on Mirror Lake with at least 5 boats. There would be a team of players on the island and they would have to try to fend off the 5 boats trying to get on the island. OMFG that shit would be epic af

I rub my boyfriend's penis for good luck before exams... I've gotten so used to it that I don't feel confident during exams unless I do so... #ihaveissues #iamanidiotsandwich

So I'm an above average looking individual and it makes me super uncomfortable when the guys and girls I talk to get awkward during a conversation with me and can't maintain eye contact. I don't know how to do ugly I was born this way

why the fuck do some professors give 2 midterms? seriously wtf??? dude i can't even pass one midterm, do you really need to give us 2???????