I've been doing my best to look as tired and overworked as possible around the preview students so they have been warned what college is really like.

I was in a really dark place. Everything was an act. Everything was numb. Then he showed me what it felt like to feel alive, to accept love, and to feel of value. Thank you. I can now breathe a little easier with a little less pain in my heart.

I’m failing a class.
I’m losing sleep over it, I’m breaking out over it, I’m losing my appetite over it. my anxiety symptoms and instrusive thoughts are starting to come back. I’ve never failed a class before.
I can’t lose my scholarships, I can’t tell my mom because she’ll freak out
I have an exam for it tomorrow that I only just remembered so I haven’t even studied, I don’t know what I’m going to do

and to top it all off I’m having one of the worst picking relapses I’ve had in a long time. my fingers are covered in bandaids and my nose is so sore and raw from all the skin i’ve picked off of it

i don’t know what i’m going to do.

I hate that chapel is required and that we get a fine if we don't complete all of them. I feel like that puts a negative feeling on Chapel. We shouldn't be forced to go, we should want to go. I still have 10 chapel credits to fill and I don't want to ever go because it's that frustrating.

I really just wanna start a group for singing a capella for fun. Make arrangements with people however we like.

I am one of those people who freaks out when someone doesn't respond to my text messages right away. It makes me think that they were texting while driving and got into a car crash.

I feel like Bon has vastly improved lately. Am I right?!?

Seeing all these confessions, I feel like I need never mention my own troubles because the other guy is already depressed, can't find meaning, "Oh I'm ugly", and shit like that. The hell? And you know, because they're so depressed, you can't joke, make fun, have a good time because Sad McDarkcloud over here isn't done raining. Since when do we just put our crap out On everyone like that? also, what the hell is everybody's obsession with being happy about? What do you think life is fucking peaches and cream? Your ancestors lived in fucking mud houses! Life is everything, it's not this dream, man. 10 years from now you may be the star new entrpreneur and in another you're cleaning toilets, because that's life. It doesn't come with a guarantee. I can't wrap my mind around this idealistic dream shit. How freaking depressing is it to think that everyone has to like you and that everyone's gotta "value" you and that you owe making everyone happy? I mean you'll be torn to shreds in days! What IS this!? I'm not seeing it.