#918 Today for the first time I decided to take the short walk to my shower naked. I had never done it before and I thought my roommates were gone. Just as I walked out of my room my roommates boyfriend walked out of her room. I shrieked and apologized and covered up my junk. He just stared at me and said "You're next" and walked back into her room. You're next, what the hell does that even mean?

#910 I was really late on doing a huge project, so I convinced my professor that I recently "came out" to everyone and that I was having a really hard time. HE told me not to even worry about the project and gave me an A for the class. I don't even feel bad. Winning.

#908 I hate it here. I'm so sick of this school and my major. At this point I would be cool with just becoming a housewife. I'm so done with everything.

#907 What's worse than slow walkers in the hallways? Slow walking PROFESSORS! They just take up the entire hallway! Then once you finally get to class, you're questioned on why you were late. REALLY?!?!

#906 Ended last semester with a 3.7. and they say stoners are lazy.....

#905 I only want a girlfriend so I can grow out my beard and still get laid regularly.

#904 One of my biggest life goals is to make my ex regret breaking up with me. Even though she was a huge bitch, and I would never get back with her, I really want her to regret it.

#903 I recently discovered that I am Jesus Christ reincarnated. The NSA is reading this so I can't say too much. I am being monitored by merites affiliated with wsu and my neighbors dog has instructed me to only correspond with my commander on public computers and owije boards.