#1103 Ive always wanted to egg someone's house…I know it would be a TERRIBLE clean up and it would really suck…but it's definitely on the bucket list and one day it's gonna happen dammit

#1101 I really want a pet unicorn. Like unhealthly bad.

#1102 Sometimes when I hear someone struggling to take a shit, I whisper to them, "It's okay man, you got this." I like to think of myself as the poop whisperer.

#1100 I'm sick and tired of people complaining when they can't be with their significant other every second of the day. My partner goes to college 4 plus hours away and I get see him maybe once every couple months? Being apart is not the end of the world and maybe instead of complaining about it you can try and accept it, because, frankly, all these Facebook posts of "I won't get to see my bf for two whole days!!! Someone tell me what to do to distract me!!!" are starting to get really irritating.

#1099 Holy judgement winona! I understand some people have higher standards than others but what I dont understand is everyone's need to publicly judge them. These are confessions, and they're finally getting back to funny/ entertaining instead of fuck-my-life-go-cut-myself ones but good lord the amount of judgement on the comments makes me question the people that go here more than the actual confessions do.

#1095 I'm thinking of wearing elevator shoes so the girls stop calling me "hey kid" and I might have a shot with one of them.

#1097 I would do so many dirty things to the owner of the white Chevy pickup truck on 9th and grand. So. Many. Things.

#1098 just because i don't have to take out loans to pay for college, doesn't mean i'm a stuck up bitch. i hate how people always make that assumption.