Marcus In My ASL Class, You Are Super Attractive! Are You Single? (;

@horse_ebooks being a piece of performance art instead of the random bit of genius we thought it was is way more upsetting to me than it should be.

Ok, so I'm a girl and I enjoy masturbation on the off chance that my roommate is not around. I haven't experimented with any toys yet, because my parents would never be accepting of my choice to masturbate and if they found out, they would probably never speak to me again. I have however, experimented with various vegetables while using a condom. I am still a virgin and I want to remain a virgin until I'm married, but sometimes I'm tempted to have sex just because I want that "feel good" feeling. I'm sick of using my imagination. I really just want to feel an actual dick sliding in and out of my vagina. I want to feel someone inside of me pushing as hard as they can. It's really weird, but I actually want someone to cum inside of me too. I want to hear the moans and groans of my partner and want them to listen to me scream when I'm about to explode. I want someone to slowly pull of all of my clothes, caressing every part of my body and then eventually pop my cherry. Is that too much to ask?

I'm a 19 year old female and I've rarely ever been attracted to a guy within my age range. I've always preferred older men. Manly men. Like 30-50 in age. Any other ladies have this problem?

Some days I just want a beer during my breaks.. But then I remember I still have to go to class.. Is it so bad to have one beer and then go to class?

Shout out to the guy riding his bike down Garfield this morning singing/shouting "I Believe I Can Fly"... You gave me the lolz and it was a highlight to my day, so thank you!

So I've been seeing this girl for a few weeks and she had just broke up with her boyfriend (bad timing on my part) but we always hit it off. We started hooking up and more and more often and I was under the impression that things were going in my favor. She was always telling me how happy she was with me and how I made her happier than she's been in forever. Well today she decided to tell me that even though I'm "the sweetest guy" to her and I'm amazing, she is going back to her ex even though she's stated she likes me. So to the girls that say "nice guys do finish first" your argument is invalid. Okay, my rant is over now.

I'm a virgin because most chicks are just plain idiots. Fat guy with high standards... never a good thing if you want to pound the pain away.