you are in my chem 103 class at 11 Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I know your name is Jake and I would really like to get to know you... so hott!!!

Stop being a whore, maybe then you'll find a good relationship.

I wonder if I'll ever live on a floor where there aren't people constantly screaming. It's so obnoxious. Bridgman 1st floor girls, I'm glad you're having fun, but could you please be more respectful?

I don't study or ever pay attention in class and I still maintain a perfect grade score.

To whomever shat in their Hollister male underwear and left it in our yard for me to pick up... I hope you know that your $15 boxer briefs are now in the dumpster. I hope you can learn to control your bowl movements. You sick bastard.

There were three chicks walking up the hill this morning who bothered me immensely.. One girl was talking about one of her roommates. She said "yeah.. you haven't met her. We aren't like each other at all.. She's like one of those people who's into anime. yeh.. you know how they are, so she like doesn't leave our room."
Are. you. kidding. me.

I now know how Jay must have felt as I am staring at the green dot next to my crushes name in facebook chat.

I want to go sit in a stall on campus and wait for someone to walk in to go to the bathroom and yell, "Why are you crawling back up?!?"