If anyone here ever feels bad about themselves, just know that i spent my first three weeks here trying to make a move on a girl and when we started getting real close as friends and i finally got the courage to ask her out, i figured out the hard way that she was lesbian
Moral of the story
Figure these things kinds of things out asap before you start getting your hopes up

Seriously who are these TAMS kids. They like 2 years old.

#2004 I jacked off with my roommate asleep in the room. Yep. Not to him, he just happened to be there. Gotta do what you gotta do when you wanna do it.

#2003 I just had really bad sex. As in, so bad I couldn't even fake an orgasm. Guy kept biting my pussy. I like pain considerably more than the average person, but biting my pussy is just uncomfortable. He claimed to be a dom, but that's apparently only in his dreams. Good dom's gotta exist somewhere in this town, right?

#2002 Jacob b. You almost hit me with your car today. Watch it.

#2001 Dear Alec,I’m glad I sat with you at breakfast. You are one interesting and very smart person when you finally start talking and you definitely made my day. I couldn't help but notice that you look like Ryan Gosling.You should smile more as well. From the girl that sat with you last week.

#2000 They need to offer Anger Management sessions for the good people living at Maple Hall or something. Some of the people I've talked to have pretty quiet halls but I hear demonic screams all freaking day (and night) long in mine. So maybe not Anger Management, but an exorcism.

#1999 So about two weeks ago, I got out of a horrible break-up with my significant other, and ever since then, I've been a complete mess. Today, however, things started to look up.

You see, I was in line at Big Mike's pondering on how to move on from the break-up. As I approached the counter, I noticed this super-cute girl sitting down at a table nearby and gave one of those quick passing-glance smiles. Sounds strange, but the fact that she reciprocated felt really good.

She was cute as Hell, too! She wore black yoga pants and a purple sweater, and even though her body was amazing, I couldn't get my eyes off her shiny red hair. I felt as jittery as Mia Wallace in Pulp Fiction, after she got that adrenaline shot in the chest cavity.

Anyways, after I get my coffee, I somehow muster up the courage to come up to her and ask if someone is sitting with her. As it turns out, she also went through a break-up and was sitting there pondering on it, so she let me sit down with her, and we both immediately spilled our guts.

About an hour-and-a-half of pure catharsis passed by super quickly for both of us. As we sat there trying to think of a way to shift the conversation, she caught me staring at her cleavage. When I realized what I was doing, I was uber-apologetic, but she smiled and thought it was cute. She invited me to her apartment (she lives in Sterling) since her roommates were both in the middle of a two-hour lab. We went up to the third floor and into her apartment, and we start to make out on her couch passionately.

After some heavy petting, I guided her hand to my zipper, and she unzipped my fanny pack by mistake. Lo and behold, spaghetti started to fall out. I tried desperately to clean it up with my sock, and as my attempts became feeble, I started to cry. I got embarrassed beyond belief, and I farted watery diarrhea all over my man skirt. Then I smeared shit all over the window and asked her to marry me.

She said no.