Sometimes I wonder if I've had a hard life or if My aunts are right when they say I have it easy. I am in late 20's and live with my grandparents. I only work part time and am provided shelter, a computer, a car, a playstation, and sometimes allowances. Not gonna lie, that aspect of my life is fucking awesome. But sometimes I wonder if it's for a reason. My grandparents have always loved me unconditionally, but before I moved in with them during my late teens, but before that I had a troubled life. My father was emotionally abusive and my mother really was neglectful. She was more concerned about fulfilling her needs then those of me and my siblings: For example, when were were in school as teens and preteens we were running low on clothes and ate at fast food restaurants all the time. Right about that time is when she and my step dad (once her divorce from my dad was settled) bought a new record player/ sound system / CD player/etc for them. It was off limits to us. I honestly don't know if she loves me as much as drugs, alcohol, and porn. My dad cared for me, which is also ironic because he would also get drunk when I was a kid and scream at me before sometimes sleeping naked on the couch during his black out. Porn was stashed everywhere. Sometimes he watched it full blast in the living room when my siblings and I were in our bedrooms. This was after my parent's divorce. He was occasionally physically abusive, but not very often thank goodness. Though he was rather fond of using the belt. When I moved in with my mom she would do some of the exact same perverted shit. It really was a gross, white trash situation. One time she even had loud sex with my step dad in the back bedroom (yet another ex-convict). Problem is, my bedroom was right next to it. During the time my best friend was crashing over for the night. We were like 14. Around age 9, I was almost molested by my creepy uncle. He is very scary and always lords it over me at christmas and thanksgiving. He works hard though, so my family loves him. My parents were not monsters though. My dad had a battle with addictions but he was really smart, had a quick sense of humor, and was always supportive of anything I wanted to do. He got me through college, financially. My mom was abused as a young girl so I understand why she has her issues. One of my parents recently passed away and I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, I'm sad and depressed, but I'm not crushed by it and that makes me feel guilty. I pretty much spend my days alone in my room with my computer and books. Sometimes I'll leave to go to class, piss/shit, or take my medicine for psychosis, but I am still pretty much a recluse. Don't know if I'm very lucky to have my grandparents and their finances to help me out or if it's almost like a karma refund. Anyway, here's a huge confession to spend some time reading or no time skipping over.

Confession: sometimes I get nervous going to parties because I'm afraid I'll run into that rare anthropology major who actually knows their shit and makes everyone look racist by being able to think about social issues more lucidly.

I cheated on my gf with my long term friend-with-benefits/booty call. The sex with my gf, who isn't adventurous AT ALL, is just plain and boring in the sack so I have to venture elsewhere. I would break up with her but I really do like her a lot and hope she'll get past her sexual reservations.

To the black guy in Bruce hall who plays the ukulele all the time, you are very talented.. and attractive.

You say your my friend yet you treat me like shit. Some friend you are what a d bag.

I have a really high sex drive and there's nothing I love more than giving a girl an orgasm. I'm a guy in his late 20's but I still have a very high testosterone level and have to have sex A LOT (yes, I've been tested for it). I do have a girlfriend but we go weeks without having sex and I'm super frustrated because of it. She tells me it's the best sex she's ever had, and believe me this isn't the first time I've heard it, but still no frequent sex. I'm going crazy here. Comment on this post if you're looking for a friends with benefits situation, we can work something out.

I wish that most of the UNT Confessions weren't about sex.

SO, Me and my roommate are super cool with each other but.. he has some issues.. The one thing that happens to bother me and other people the most is that when he sleeps... the guy touches himself! Like as we speak right now he's just grabbed a handful of himself.. Last semester, i had some friends over to watch movies,there were some females in the group and WHAM! full on nut scratching action.. From then on they could never look at him the same or go near him...