#9879 Here's a tip dudes... when I dance with you at the cactus, or wherever, that does not mean I want to fuck you. It does not even mean i'm attracted to you. It means i'm having fun and want to DANCE with you. That is all.

#9878 Guess who bought his AAA batteries? Weekend is back on again.

#9877 Like this status if you and your partner swing, are polyamorous, or experiment with relationship models, and you are still madly in love with one another. We're a growing community.

#9876 Bear with me, because this is kinda fucked up:

I want to tie up a girl, gag and blindfold her, watch her struggle for a bit, then put it in. And the girl I want to do it to the most? She's the "pure" type and would probably hate me for it.

Of course, I wouldn't actually do it (to her or anyone else) without consent. I may be a sadist, but I'm not an asshole.

#9875 Shorter men (under 5'8): please don't be intimidated by my heels. I'll only be taller than you for a night. The fact you have washboard abs and broad shoulders more than makes up for your height "deficiency".

#9874 Single: fuck compromise, I'm doing me. Dating: knowing how to compromise is relevant, but only to a point. In a relationship: compromise is extremely important. Marriage: compromise is essential.

Learn how to compromise if you don't want to be single for the rest of your fucking life Jonathan.

#9873 To my roommate: stop cheating on your girlfriend 10 feet away from me every other night, or I swear I'm going to bang her out when you're visiting your parents.

#9872 Never tell your friends about your relationship problems. Keep it between two people. We can't solve your problems for you... only you can, and you can only do that with the person in question. My confession: My boyfriend took his friend's advice to "take a break from me so he can see what it's like to date and fuck others".... while my boyfriend is gullible, and a dick for doing so, he only values his friend's opinion out of loyalty... the dude ain't exactly a relationship whiz. Whatever. I'm hooking up with two rugby players tonight, so I hope he's enjoying his temporary freedom.