#16309 I automatically dislike anyone with my name because it feels like a competition and let’s be honest ur not winning that

#16308 Some people think I'm nice and shy when really I'm evil and wouldn't think twice to embarrass your ass.

#16298 I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

#16299 My roommate meows like a cat and we call her the ice queen

#16300 To be honest people who know me both on the internet and in real life must be so fucking confused

#16301 I'm gay, but I want to experiment with girls. Problem is, I'm too scared to pursue girls.

#16302 I hate it when you have those dumb ass people in class that never listen to the teacher. I'm in a class with about twenty-five people and the teacher will give us instructions on what to do in groups. I swear every time, after she's done asking if anyone has questions, these two hands will go up in class asking what were doing... Dumb asses!

#16303 I cheated on a midterm. and i still failed.