#18507 I intentionally get boring movies to watch with my girlfriend, so we end up getting bored and having sex

#18506 Sometimes I close my eyes when I'm walking in the dark, cause I only play on legendary

#18505 I got into an argument with this ass of a girl who was being disrespectful towards me, she freaked out and started being nice. I've now realized she has a hell of an ass

#18504 There is not nearly enough coffee in this world to help me deal with this shit today.

#18503 I used to think I love you. Now I don't think. I just love you.

#18502 To the girl that noticed that I was lonely and took me back to her room for a steamy, satisfying session of love: Thank you. I needed that jump start that one Saturday afternoon so that I could feel normal again, talk normally to girls without the desperation of "when am I having sex again yet in years" killing me. I am normal again, got the need for girls off my mind and can now wait for a girlfriend to show up in my life... and if not it's okay now. Finally, someone understands that sometimes we just need some love. Why can't everyone do that, though?

If a random girl needed sex a ton of guys would be down, but if a guy needed it society would say: "deal with it". What a shame

#18492 The grass always looks greener on the other side, but it rarely ever is

#18493 How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?