#20782 So excited to sleep one night I cannon balled into bed, the frame broke, fuuuuuuuuuuuccccccck

#20781 got so drunk, ran into a random house party to poop, poop wouldn’t flush so my friend made a hole in the window screen and threw my shit out the window

#20780 My buddy and his gf are such prudes that they’ve been dating a year and he just now starting getting blowjobs, but he won’t let her suck it without a condom on.

#20779 whenever I’m drunk, I always feel my pocket vibrate and think I got a text, but it’s just my wallet.…and I’m holding my phone.

#20778 My girlfriend sucks, because she doesn’t suck

#20776 All those who shit on guys who complain about getting friend zoned have not been friend zoned. I have been friend zoned and the shit hurts. (I am a girl). He said that he valued our friendship but he doesn't see me in that light. I too value our friendship and the fact that he didn't get weirded out by my feelings. Being friend zoned doesn't mean you were only nice to a person with the hope of something more. It means you befriended a person and ended up catching the feelings. You befriended someone you thought more of than he/she thought of you. And the shit burns like no other. It means you were not enough to someone you cared too much about.

#20777 It's almost impossible to get roommates/housemates that actually give a f about keeping things organized and clean; especially the kitchen. It stresses me out being at home, when 'home' is supposed to be a place of warmth and comfort. Now I'm almost always on campus, just to get away from the mess. I wish I could find a cheap studio to live alone.

#20774 Amelia Shettle you're so cute!