Thursday, 04 April 2013 08:36 AM
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My roommate and I hardly even sleep in our own beds. We usually just fall asleep playing Night Crawlers.
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:59 AM
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I ate my twin in the womb
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:50 AM
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Love has 4 letters and so does food. Coincidence? I think not!
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:49 AM
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NEVER judge a book by its cover. For example "50 shades of grey" is not a book about the color grey
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:45 AM
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I have a feeling that Spongebob will get his license before Taylor Swift falls in love.
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:42 AM
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My graduation speech "I Hate All You Fuckers! I'm Out!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:38 AM
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Dear roommate. For constantly staying up til 6 in the morning almost every night, I've shaved my pubes with your electric razor. (More than once) I just did again.
Thursday, 04 April 2013 07:34 AM
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The condom broke!