#157 I just seriously considered using lube as chapstick because I couldn't reach my chapstick from my bed. I've hit a new low.

#156 So, I tend to use my friendsy account while intoxicated. Thus, a LOT of hookup requests get sent, because my drunk logic goes "Well, they'll only see it if they send me one too, so yuuup". Then, while sober, I check it and see several mutual hookup notifications. "Oh! Interesting." says I. And then while rechecking their profile I notice that it says my request is pending again.....which means once they saw it was mutual, they unclicked it. wow. yeah, good job. This has happened...3 times now? get your shit together people. you just made it way more awkward. you could have just said you didn't take the site very seriously, which is what I've done a couple of times, when my drunkeness got the better of me and I clicked the button one someone I shouldn't have. taking it back is just fucking rude. It's all "oooh, someone's interested, let's follow this hint up. hmmm, it could be any of these people. let's click on this one just to see....oh, it's not thank god. now let's try...them. OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT." really? if you click on the profiles of the people you think are attractive and it's not them, why bother after that? really tho, wtf?

#155 MAC DIX has a new submission! There is a god!

#154 to whoever sent Brandy a singing Valentine, you reminded me of how kind Macalester students can be. You made her cry and you gave me goosebumps. Keep up the good work! THANK YOU.

#153 nunca me acuerdo de olvidarte.

#152 So I'm working for the military as a teenager, which sucks. Everyone thinks the government employee I live with is really hot, but I just don't see it. The two girls that like me are super weird, too. One has no emotions and the other's a total jerk to me for her own amusement. My dad wants nothing to do with me and I'm stuck working with these two basket cases 24/7. I've nearly died several times and have saved lives on multiple occasions, but no one appreciates me. And to cap it all, Guillermo del Toro made a movie about my life without giving me any credit or mention whatsoever.

#151 Sometimes I worry that I'll never be able to love a human girl as much as I love the ad-lib in the Rich Homie Quan song where he goes "I drop the top of my whip"

#150 I am glad that my friend's girlfriend is on study abroad because all of a sudden he finds time for his friends again.