"Cambrell's confession of the day: So I posted the first couple of statuses about Joe just to get a laugh out of seeing him react to them. However people started to follow my trend. What I suggest to you followers is to set up an appointment with a health services counselor because you are dealing with some serious self identity issues. I mean you all are having a need to fit in anonymously. I see that being a serious problem that you need to get taken care of now! THATS ALLL! :) "

"If we go out and half-ass it 'cause we're scared, then we'll always wonder if we were really good enough. But if we go out there and give it all we've got... that's heroic. You guys wanna be heroes?"

"too Many Joe Vetter Confessions, Make It Stop!"

"Is Brandon Wilson single? Seriously though. I'd hit that"

"Am I still a virgin if I'm bisexual and have only had sex with one guy? I feel so out of the sexual loop of young adulthood...I only have three more slutty college years left!"

"Joe vetter? Mmmmmmmmm. *licks lips* I'll take me some o dat."

"Almost every other week, I single-handedly prevent a Tienanmen Square-style tank march on Hamline's campus with my bare fists. Until now, I've kept the student body in a state of blissful ignorance, silently wishing that the rest of campus would recognize my greatness and service to my alma mater.
#amioneofthecoolkidsyetguise"

"Anyone want to play on an intramural soccer team??"