I still have sick, frank, nightmares about certain women (maybe I should say Women with a capital W, because the gender dynamic is central to the whole deal in these sour dreams) treating me badly, daring me to join in their sub-sophomoric and cruel emotional games, stooping even below their baiting level to produce a reaction that humiliates me, while their provocation goes unnoticed or even secretly praised. Last night the whole dream was walking around on Halloween with that damn guy She was just friends with, me remaining cool and neutral and not interfering with their precious bonding, until they're kissing (I mean KISSING) right in front of me at the end of the night "this is the only bitch-way we hang out *resume sucking face*". It was even a good dream until that point! That's when it was over. I would never even hit an imaginary woman, but I don't have the energy to match how some can find such involved, complex, and subtle ways to hurt me. Women are such sensitive and understanding creatures (ESSENTIALISM ALERT) -- why can't they understand how badly these games hurt? I currently am dealing with this by repressing my bereavement and anger into toxic dreams as well taking all the drugs I can get my greasy paws on while still living a mostly normal life. It's not exactly the best way, but I feel locked-in. Every can forget their own small petty piece, but when they collect in my heart like coral buildup, it's a much sharper, heavier, and rougher deposit. I am not anti-woman. I am pro-woman. I love my mom and I always wish I had a sister. "Disarm you with a smile/And cut you like you want me to/Cut that little child/Inside of me and such a part of you/Ooh, the years burn ~~ I used to be a little boy/So old in my shoes/And what I choose is my choice/What's a boy supposed to do?/The killer in me is the killer in you/My love/I send this smile over to you". All I've got is a disarming smile. Beneath that is too much I haven't forgotten yet.

Ryan H***ze I am so deeply in love with you. I have always wanted u. Ughhh!!!! Come rescue me boi!!!

There is nothing worse than a fucking bro. You think girls like to be called motherfucking "shawty," you pieces of shit? Is there anything that motivates you more in life than trying to build your biceps, wearing athletic shorts and Nikes to parties on a Friday night, so long as you say "bro" as much as possible, jam out to Wiz and coerce some unfortunate but equally idiotic broad into the sack with you? Why must you also be as loud as fuck and wait around like a brainless primate until something only slightly a,using happens and then scream something loud about how much you like partying? What kind of person majors in economics AND fitness biology or whatever the hell it’s called? Why is there even a fitness biology major? Why do you loiter in front of and in the hallways of Luther on weekends and heckle everyone that walks in between you and your douche bag friends? You are spineless, and you are unwanted. You are what school shootings are made of. Fuck you, you fucking comfort-zone ridden, jockstrap wearing, suburbanite pieces of shit. Fuck you for date-rape, and fuck you for not knowing any other vocal volume besides maximum. Fuck you for your stupid fucking studded earrings and fuck you for liking club music bullshit and then the entire WeFest lineup when you want to be “in touch” with your emotions or lack thereof.

/rant

fuck you

I'm twenty-one and considering Rogaine.

I almost banged a guy on the football field before my first day of classes at Augsburg and slept with more than 10 guys my first semester. I'm now graduated and couldn't tell you how many guys I was with. Also not sure which one I got the herpes from...

Yeah, I'll tell you upfront This is Ryan H***ze, I think you guys need to grow a pair and tell the people you like that you like them. Also, if you have a serious mental issue, please seek help or find someone to talk to instead of leaving it on here. Have a good week! :)

I’m sick of summer and this waiting around.
Man, it’s (almost) September, and I’m skipping this town
Hey It’s no mystery, there’s nothing here for me now

I gotta get back to Augsburg,
I gotta get back to school.
Gotta get myself to Augsburg,
Where everybody is so cool.

Back to classes and student groups, and sub-par caf feasts,
To parties and chillin and the fun will never cease.
It’s all that I love, and it's all that I need.
AUGSBURG, AUGSBURG, I think I'm going back---

DJ W. for president.