#sorrynotsorry Confessions

#31644 If you go to a Christian K-12 and go to a Christian college, how can you spread the gospel to the people who have never experienced Christianity? Also, how will you deal with reality?

#31643 Dear Darwin,
I know I'm not the fittest, can I die now?
(Recommend CAPS if you want but I've been going to therapy since I was a child, some trauma just can't be fixed.)

#31642 I can't help but laugh at those people who have hundreds/thousands of followers on IG but barely get any likes. But hey, you're considered to be a lame loser amongst your peers if you don't buy your followers. Whatever it takes to appear edgy, I suppose.

#31641 So all the dates I've gone on recently would go very well and each time we would plan a 2nd date while still on the first date. Then it gets quiet where we are and they hear my heart ticking. They ask about it and despite my best attempts to explain it in a lighthearted manner and a small joke about it, they always end the date right then and then proceed to ghost me. I mean, I get it, the reality can be terrifying when you first hear about it and at a university where men so heavily outnumber the women, they absolutely have their choice of men that are healthy, that havent had the surgeries I've had. It makes total sense for them to desire someone that's healthier than I. I workout twice a day, 6 days a week but there is still the core issue that will never go away.

I just wish... I had a friend to help I dont know, screen them I guess? Make sure they're ok with these medical issues that are currently fly under complete control before I bother with taking them out on a date.

I know when most read this, theyll think there is something either I'm not saying that caused the date to end or I just read the signs wrong. All I can say is, I'm oblivious to when someone is interested in me and for me to notice it, theyd have to be really obvious about it. Maybe I did read the signs wrong, either way though, with how the dates have gone, I feel defeated and unwanted. It makes me want to give up on dating for now so I stop putting myself in a position to be hurt. I had finally gotten into a position where i am healthier than ever, and hadn't been as confident as I was then, for a very long time. After all these dates though... I just want to find someone that's ok with these medical issues of mine...

This goes to E.J.D. we met last year. Towards the end of fall semester. We became close. I thought I loved you. You became my whole world. I didn't know what to do you you pushed me to grow. You pushed me to be better. And it worked. But sadly I didn't realize anything until I had already destroyed the bond between us. You changed me for the better. Made me a better person. A funny person. I miss you all the time. Though I realized I never loved you as we both thought. Nay, i am not saying I didn't love you. I did. Nay as a lover but... as a brother. I know this may be strange to outsiders reading this but to you it will make sense. When I lost you I lost most of the family I had left. My foster parents who were kind enough to house me kicked me out. Me depression has gotten worse. Though I refuse to let anyone see that. I refuse to let people see I'm broken. All I wanted to do for the past 4 days is to talk to YOU. To hear your voice. But, knowing it wouldn't matter anyways I changed my number. You won't be able to contact me. And as much as it hurts, I did it so I don't mess things up more. I relish the memories I have of you. I wish I hadn't screwed up, but I did. I take full responsibility. Just yesterday I almost did the one thing that you talked me out of in November 2018. I didn't. I made a promise to you and I Will NEVER break said promise. I know it's meaningless to apologize so I'm not going to. Which as you know is a big step for me. I just want you to know I have faith we will talk again and we have a lot of catching up to do. E.J.D. even though you're younger than me, by a tad, you have become and shall remain mhy big brother. I love you man. -mr. Muppet

#31640 I love women that are into fitness and that workout a fair bit. It shows me how seriously they take their health. Just wish I wasn't shy that I cant bring myself to talk to them. Would love to have a workout partner for once.

#31639 I know it is not healthy but cannot stop comparing myself with my friends. Seems like they all got jobs and relationships and have a normal life. On the other hand, I am in my last semester, applied to 200 jobs and got nothing. I would blame myself if I was lazy but I am not :( Tired of feeling like a failure all the time. Is anybody else out there feeling like this?

#31638 You know that feeling when a ball of wax rolls around in your ear and you're fishing for the right shape object to dig it out, you find it, then you get this whole body shiver for how awesome it's going to feel? Just had that.